When I was a young man I was as keen to get my rocks off as anyone. The fire burns hot when you’re young. But the whole idea was that you both enjoyed it (always my problem with Monicagate, BTW – he showed himself to be no gentleman).

The idea of going slops after a string of my mates with some poor girl who’ll (rightly) hate you afterwards – yuk.

As in, need to behave like professionals.

I hope that has cleared that up adequately for my (inexplicably still) rugby-loving relatives.

For one, you’re not only a grown woman but you’re one tough customer, really. It’s a really silly trope contributing to a discussion and adding “I just know I’m going to be ATTACKED!!!1!” Either you have the courage to make a comment or you don’t. But how do you know you’re going to be attacked? Tigtog just made a favourable mention of musicians, too. Where have you seen wholesale condemnation of musicians on a feminist website? Please link!

Two – people might disagree with you. But that’s not an attack – unless it’s an abusive comment, and this is a moderated blog, and you are, as I said, one of my fave commenters. So if you did actually get “attacked”, as opposed to debated, I’d pull the offending comment, or disemvowel the bastard. So there!

Three – What’s with this dissing of young feminists? Many of my commenters here are young feminists and I read their blogs with much pleasure. Some of them may not have the depth of experience you have but that doesn’t mean they don’t bring a clearheaded and well written – and often very funny – take to the experiences they have had so far. They, to use a young person expression, fuckin’ rock!

As do you!

Don’t assume the fight or flight stance unless it’s warranted. And I say this as someone who’s withstood quite a lot of kicking on my own blogs!

(I deleted the 2 paras I wrote, in fear of young feminits attacking me)

Despite lugging equipment, musos are not testosterone-pumped, and rehearsals don’t usually have manager/coaches thumping them on to kill the opposition. A musician (even Axl Rose) is an aesthete, not an athlete.

(oh I just know an attack is coming)

I heard Our Germs on the radio yesterday noting that the one constant in team bonding traditions for male teams is shared transgression, which starts with underage drinking and stealing street signs, and moves on to the predatory isolation of trusting women and premeditated demanding of pack sex.

I suspect that the other athletes Helen mentions and the rock and rollers you mention are too individualistic to need such team bonding in the first place, so the group traditions that would lead to predatory pack sex just don’t develop.

A couple of days into this whole mess I found myself wondering out loud why weren’t rock and roll musicians regularly in the news for this sort of thing. They have groupies too right? So what’s so terribly different? Definitely something about this particular setting- the emphasis on the team, the over glorification, etc etc.